He works in the waiting
Tanya brush painting the front porch, summer and fall of 2025
It can be said a number of ways. “Trials refine us,” or maybe, “There’s no testimony without the test.” But I’d endured a season of anticipatory grief, swallowed by loss, followed by a summer of trying to find my sea legs. I felt throughout the difficulties I was still on track. Still felt like putting one foot in front of the other and tackling the activities of the day as acts of surrender and obedience to the Lord. That He was working in the waiting.
I couldn’t tell you why or how it all came to a head, really. I’d known for years that the stresses of home, managing the needs of our children and aging parents from afar was a heavy burden. But up until the summer of 2025, I’d simply done it all, perhaps without thinking. Perhaps at the expense of my own sanity and health.
After my mother passed, the abscess created by my grief somehow magnified what was most important. Like the void of her and our relationship was a deep reflecting pool, allowing me to peer in and see things more clearly. I saw that my soon-to-be fourth grader was reading at a first grade level despite months of academic interventions. I noticed my almost-middle schooler was struggling with anxiety and organization. Separately, through daily phone calls with my dad, I realized how much help he required to process paperwork, handle the family property in Italy, or plan for the future of his home in New York. All of these efforts needed my attention; I knew I needed to give my best energy and time to my family in this season to address them.
I prayed that with some focused time I could work with my children and my father and put systems in place so that we could get on the other side of these hurdles. My prayer was that I could return to work as I’d known it in the not-so-distant future, once those systems were in place. But would that would be? It was a true leap of faith, or living open to the Lord’s call on my life, serving my family, waiting and hoping I’d be able to use my gifts to work again in the future, in the ways I was most familiar and confident in.
Until then, I’d wait.
I also prayed that this hiatus would be a time of clarity. Within the first two weeks I had the mental bandwidth to shape the ideas for the consultancy I’d had in mind for years, as well as some exciting content I’d always wanted to create, because now I had the time, space and energy to build it. This, along with some other special house projects seemed valuable and within reach, possible now.
While I’m waiting, would the focus on my family pay off and will the wait have been worth it? Would the sudden spin-up of my consultancy be fruitful? How about these special projects?
We know that sometimes the Lord doesn’t answer our questions, or doesn’t answer them the way we’d like to hear. What we forget is that He’s working in the waiting, and sometimes that additional time spent in a holding pattern is absolutely critical for the people around us, or for our environment to mature and be ready for the Lord’s next steps for us.
The waiting may feel like a pause or even a temporary setback, but Simon Sinek recently described successful career or life growth as “slingshots” rather than straight paths. In the same way the Lord works in the waiting or refines us through the journey, Sinek explains that resilient leaders don’t simply accelerate after shifting directions, like a slingshot, but they’re also proving they’re capable of reinventing themselves.
If we remain steadfast in our waiting season and close to God in prayer and hope, the waiting can be a time of incredible activation. Here are some of the resources I’ve read as reminders of these promises:
7 Ways to Wait Patiently for God to Answer - Crosswalk
Cup of tea while looking out the kitchen window